“I don’t like thinking about this, but, if we were to ever break up, you would give me a get, right?” Suzie asked me about divorce the other day.

“Oh honey, of course.”

“Because we would need to do something like that.”

“I know; I know what a get is.”

“I mean, just in case we wanted to get Jewishly married again.”


“Well, that’s why we would need that.”

“I know, but why would you want to be Jewish with anyone else?!”

For some reason, the idea of a get didn’t freak me out as much as the idea that Suzie would continue to be Jewish if we ever got divorced. I was fine with the conversation until we started talking about continuing Jewish practice post divorce.

I know logically that Suzie and I would each continue to be Jewish if we ever got divorced. But it just makes no sense! How could she be Jewish with someone else? I could understand her kissing someone else. I could understand her sleeping with someone else. But blessing shabbat candles? And praying? How could she even think about doing that with another person?! I suppose in my mind Jewish practice is more sacred and more intimate than just about any other action, even sleeping with someone.

Yes, I understand that she’s training to become a rabbi. I know that Judaism is part of her livelihood. I know I don’t have any proprietary rights over Suzie’s Jewishness. But, still.

Suzie calmed me down and kissed the tears from my cheeks. I told her I would give her a get if it ever came to that. She told me she wouldn’t be Jewish with anyone else. I smiled sheepishly, despite myself.

Lag B Blog Day 30.